He's No Chuck Norris
My co-worker sent me this little story on Roger Clemens, it explains how he took advantage of the local Hard Rock while pitching for the Red Sox but what stood out for me was this:
“Whenever he came into the Hard Rock, they had to play ‘Rocket Man,’ ” recalled another ex-employee. “He really liked that.”
Oh man, what a dork. So, my coworker and I have decided that Roger Clemens is the anti Chuck Norris. And like good employees we immediately came up with our Roger Clemens list. He are the fruits of that non-labor.
Roger Clemens hates kittens.
Roger Clemens doesn't wipe.
Roger Clemens chews with his mouth open.
Roger Clemens passes on the right.
Roger Clemens has complex chronic halitosis.
Roger Clemens uses the middle urinal.
After a workout Roger Clemens doesn't wipe down the equipment .
Roger Clemens doesn't flush.
Roger Clemens doesn't cover his mouth when he sneezes.
When Roger Clemens farts he blames the dog and if the dog isn't around he blames his wife.
Exiting a plane Roger Clemens doesn't say "buh bye" to the stewardess.
Roger Clemens leaves his seat back and tray down when landing.
When Roger Clemens is on fire he goes, jumps, and slides.
If there is a threat it is women and children last for Roger Clemens.
Roger Clemens wears white before Memorial Day.
Roger Clemens brushes back kids at Family Day softball game.
Roger Clemens signs autographs in invisible ink.
Please, feel free to add your own.