Archive | September, 2007

I’m Very Unhappy

Posted on 30 September 2007 by Ed Z

The Drudge headline for all the world to see:

Mets Complete
Collapse, Miss Playoffs…

I’ll be slamming my head against a wall if you need me.

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Friday Funny: Chuck Norris on Credit Crisis

Friday Funny: Chuck Norris on Credit Crisis

Posted on 28 September 2007 by Ed Z

As some of you know, I am a Mets fan.  My hopes of a playoff appearance,
never mind a World Series title, are slipping away.  I needed a laugh and a
friend provided this:

Chuck Norris doesn’t target inflation. He roundhouse-kicks it until it begs
for mercy.

The Chuck Norris dollar buys 3 Canadian dollars, and trades at parity with
the euro.

Chuck Norris doesn’t supply collateral, only collateral damage.

The tears of Chuck Norris would supply enough liquidity to solve the credit
crisis. Too bad he never cries.

When the yield on a Chuck Norris bond goes up, the price also rises.

Chuck Norris trades on fear and greed simultaneously.

Alan Greenspan calls Chuck Norris “The Maestro.”

Chuck Norris has already banked his dividend payment from Northern Rock Plc.

Chuck Norris funds at Libor flat.

Chuck Norris Asset Management made 50 percent on its subprime mortgage-backed
bond fund last month.

Chuck Norris doesn’t borrow at the Fed’s discount window. Chuck Norris LENDS
at the Fed’s discount window.

Chuck Norris’s curves never invert.

Net income at Goldman Sachs Group Inc. rose 79 percent in the third quarter;
profit at Chuck Norris Securities Inc. climbed 80 percent.

There is no market regulator. Just a list of securities Chuck Norris allows
to be traded.

Chuck’s iPhone never needs recharging.

Chuck Norris doesn’t buy gold to hedge against inflation. Gold buys Chuck
Norris to hedge against inflation.

Chuck Norris charges the Bank of England a penalty rate for borrowing. And
guarantees its deposits.

Chuck Norris is the pilot Ben Bernanke calls when he wants to shower the
economy with dollar bills. Sometimes, Chuck refuses to fly.

Chuck Norris gets ALL of his funding from the asset-backed commercial paper
market.

Chuck Norris doesn’t mark-to-market. The market marks to Chuck Norris.

When the U.S. economy sneezes, the world catches a cold. When Chuck Norris
sneezes, the U.S. economy catches pneumonia.

When Chuck Norris makes you a price, it isn’t an offer; it’s an obligation to
buy.

Chuck Norris isn’t a market maker; he IS the market.

Chuck Norris can still get a 125 percent mortgage on a $2 million condo
without providing proof of earnings.

Chuck Norris subprime collateralized debt obligations still trade at 100
percent of face value.

Chuck completed Halo 3 on his Microsoft Corp. Xbox 360 on the day before the
computer game went on sale.

Chuck Norris has a trade surplus with China.

 

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Thought of the Day

Posted on 27 September 2007 by Ed Z

You know a product is peaking when you see homeless people are wearing Crocs.

 

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The Onion: Chinese Authorities Execute 10 Million Recalled Toys

The Onion: Chinese Authorities Execute 10 Million Recalled Toys

Posted on 24 September 2007 by Ed Z

Oh
the humanity!

In an attempt to assure the
world’s children that the millions of Chinese-made toys currently
being recalled for containing toxic lead paint and tiny choking
hazards can no longer hurt them, high-level Chinese officials
announced Tuesday that millions of playthings are being rounded up
and immediately put to death.

"We are committed to
the well-being of children and putting the consumer’s mind at
ease," said Chinese president Hu Jintao at a press
conference. "Boys and girls of the world, you need not worry.
Your toys will be executed swiftly and harshly. When we are
through, there will be nothing left to play with."

Image taken from The Onion.

 

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What to do with 756?  Answered

What to do with 756? Answered

Posted on 21 September 2007 by Ed Z

Mark Ecko bought Barry Bonds’ record breaking home run ball and is now letting the public decide its fate.

 

It
has been decided.

The ball Barry Bonds hit for
his record-breaking 756th home run will be branded with an
asterisk and sent to the Baseball Hall of Fame, its owner said
Wednesday.

Fashion designer Marc Ecko,
who bought the ball in an online auction, set up a Web site for
fans to vote on the ball’s fate, and the decision to brand it won
out over the other options, sending it to the museum unblemished
or launching it into space.

 

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Career Day?

Posted on 21 September 2007 by Ed Z

Art? 
Maybe testing security.  Pure insanity.

An MIT student with a fake
bomb strapped to her chest — later claiming it was art — was
arrested at gunpoint Friday at Logan International Airport,
officials said.

Star Simpson, 19, had a
computer circuit board and wiring in plain view over a black
hooded sweat shirt she was wearing, said State Police Maj. Scott
Pare, the commanding officer at the airport.

"She said that it was a
piece of art and she wanted to stand out on career day," Pare
said at a news conference. "She claims that it was just art,
and that she was proud of the art and she wanted to display
it."

Career day at the airport?  And who was she picking
up?  I’d like to know some background on that individual.

Via Drudge

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Jason Whitlock on the Jena Six

Posted on 21 September 2007 by Ed Z

Once again, Jason
Whitlock nails it
:

Thursday, thousands of us,
proud African-Americans, expressed our devotion to and desire to
see justice for the “Jena Six,” the half-dozen black students
who knocked unconscious, kicked and stomped a white classmate.

Jesse Jackson compared
Thursday’s rallies in Jena to the protests and marches that used
to take place in cities like Selma, Ala., in the 1960s. Al
Sharpton claimed Thursday’s peaceful demonstrations were to
highlight racial inequities in the criminal justice system.

Jesse and Al, as they’re
prone to do, served a kernel of truth stacked on a mountain of
lies.

There are undeniable racial
and economic inequities in our criminal justice system, and from
afar the “Jena Six” rallies certainly looked and felt like the
righteous protests of the 1960s.

But the reality is Thursday’s
protests are just another sign that we remain deeply locked in
denial about the path we need to travel today for true American
liberation, equality and power in the new millennium.

The story is being played out to fit a specific narrative.

Via Michelle
Malkin

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Ahmadinejad Wants to Visit Ground Zero

Posted on 19 September 2007 by Ed Z

I’ll make this quick.  The New York Sun is reporting that  Ahmadinejad has requested a visit to Ground Zero
during his stay in New York.  This cannot be allowed to happen.

Look up your local government and let them know that they must do something
to stop this.

http://www.usa.gov/Contact/Elected.shtml

Go to Hot
Air
for more details.

**Update**

An emphatic NO!

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Central CT State U Student: Bush More Evil Than Bin Laden

Posted on 19 September 2007 by Ed Z

It has gotten to the point were lefties are openly admitting to something
I’ve always known.  They’re in more allegiance wit our enemies than with
their own country.  Central Connecticut State University writer, Ryan
Yeomans asks, "Bush
or bin Laden: Who is More Evil?
"

You know the answer, Bush of course.  To level the playing field between
the two Yeomans lays this gem out:

While I cannot support bin
Laden’s opinion that all Americans should be killed and that
Islam is the only way to be saved, it is hard to overlook the
statements that he makes about the Bush administration.

Just a minor detail.

As far as conclusions go, he could not have explained the
mentality of the left better:

In finding myself in this
predicament, I questioned myself as to who the lesser evil
actually is. I ask, “Who has done more damage to the lives of
the American people?” Personally, I worry more about the next
bad decision Bush is going to make than I worry about a potential
Osama bin Laden organized terrorist attack.

It looks like the socialist agenda Bin Laden was pushing in his
video has found its audience.  Is Bin Laden’s use of Folk
Marxism
to gain favor with Americans working?

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Run Jack Run!

Posted on 18 September 2007 by Ed Z

Watch
Jack Murtha squirm
when confronted over his slandering of United States
Marines.

Pure gold.

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